a very heavy heart

So many things.. i wanna pen.. can't really describe how i'm feeling now.
That feeling of having a big chunk of your life torn off from you is back again. Ah boon is finally going to china to work. I guess it has to happen one day. I knew it from the beginning of our relationship. I just didn't think saying goodbye can be so upsetting and even more painful.
He wants me relocate to china with him in the near future. I am very hopeful. I just need to take this time to get used to him not being around me anymore.
Yes.. i do admit... i really hate it when he pisses me off or when he's in one of his moods. but now.. if there is a choice.. i would rather have all his mood swings in exchange for him not having to go to china.
He asked me how i felt about the whole thing.. i looked at him and told him supportively to go.. to make a career out of this chance...but its just so hard. I cried alot these past few days.. i dunno how to be strong.. i know he hates to see me cry... but now..instead of leaving me alone in one corner..like he usually does.. he hugs me.. and tells me that everything's gonna be alright... that we'll see each other again.. that will only be apart for the most 3 months.. 12 weeks.. 12 weeks???
i need to be strong.. and hold my head up high.. i cannot let him know or feel that i'm worried, upset and sad.. i need to be strong for him... i need to be.. for our future.. so that he may go and venture in peace.